Smoothies: Service and Sacrifice

If you are a military spouse, I hope while you are reading this you are sipping on a smoothie; a way to stick it to the “man” (the Duffey man that is). If you haven’t heard a smoothie shop owner feels that ALL military spouses, because of one particular bad encounter, feel entitled.

And I CONCUR…

I, in fact, do feel entitled. There are certain aspects that, in my opinion, we are entitled to as military spouses.

I AM ENTITLED to being treated respectfully. And if one doesn’t necessarily respect me, I can only hope that they were taught well enough to know the difference between being respectful and the action of respecting.

I AM ENTITLED to not being bullied by a keyboard motto warrior, that thinks they know my battles and inner demons.

I AM ENTITLED to be a part of a community that supports each other and me as a part of it; because, as they say “it takes a village.” A village can tear you down or build you up, and why would anyone chose to tear someone down- in particular someone who is on the same “team” as you are.

I AM ENTITLED to my uniqueness. Whether that means that I am an enthusiastic spouse, or one that is just trying to weather the storm.

However, I do understand that there is a difference between service and sacrifice. And I believe it is something that is easily confused.

My husband, a veteran, provided a service voluntarily to our country; with that service came sacrifice. And while as his spouse I didn’t provide a service, I experienced a degree of sacrifice. Our sacrifices were unique to circumstance. He missed opportunities to be a father and a husband; and I missed opportunities to meet the goals I had for myself and my family so that I could support him as I perceived a “good military spouse” should.

Many will say that I knew what I was getting into when I married him, it is my thoughts though that no one truly knows the level of dedication and sacrifice until they are in the thick of it. Saying that there is a sacrifice associated with “x,y, or z” doesn’t mean you begrudge the sacrifices that have had to be made- rather that you understand the gravity of the CHOICES that you make.

I too have seen a growing sense of entitlement, but I don’t think it is solely within our military (spouse) community. It is a societal change…When we look at the military community we must consider that we are only a percentage of a greater whole. That we all bring our attributed and flaws into this community in some capacity. But the flaws of some DON’T define a whole.

Best,

Liz

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