Smoothies: Service and Sacrifice

If you are a military spouse, I hope while you are reading this you are sipping on a smoothie; a way to stick it to the “man” (the Duffey man that is). If you haven’t heard a smoothie shop owner feels that ALL military spouses, because of one particular bad encounter, feel entitled.


I, in fact, do feel entitled. There are certain aspects that, in my opinion, we are entitled to as military spouses.

I AM ENTITLED to being treated respectfully. And if one doesn’t necessarily respect me, I can only hope that they were taught well enough to know the difference between being respectful and the action of respecting.

I AM ENTITLED to not being bullied by a keyboard motto warrior, that thinks they know my battles and inner demons.

I AM ENTITLED to be a part of a community that supports each other and me as a part of it; because, as they say “it takes a village.” A village can tear you down or build you up, and why would anyone chose to tear someone down- in particular someone who is on the same “team” as you are.

I AM ENTITLED to my uniqueness. Whether that means that I am an enthusiastic spouse, or one that is just trying to weather the storm.

However, I do understand that there is a difference between service and sacrifice. And I believe it is something that is easily confused.

My husband, a veteran, provided a service voluntarily to our country; with that service came sacrifice. And while as his spouse I didn’t provide a service, I experienced a degree of sacrifice. Our sacrifices were unique to circumstance. He missed opportunities to be a father and a husband; and I missed opportunities to meet the goals I had for myself and my family so that I could support him as I perceived a “good military spouse” should.

Many will say that I knew what I was getting into when I married him, it is my thoughts though that no one truly knows the level of dedication and sacrifice until they are in the thick of it. Saying that there is a sacrifice associated with “x,y, or z” doesn’t mean you begrudge the sacrifices that have had to be made- rather that you understand the gravity of the CHOICES that you make.

I too have seen a growing sense of entitlement, but I don’t think it is solely within our military (spouse) community. It is a societal change…When we look at the military community we must consider that we are only a percentage of a greater whole. That we all bring our attributed and flaws into this community in some capacity. But the flaws of some DON’T define a whole.



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