Over the last year or so our family has gone through some major changes. We moved back to the United States from living overseas, my husband started a new job, I went back to work (I’ve had three jobs in the past 15 months…yep, I’m every employer’s dream!), I finished my master’s degree, and our children started new schools. To say it has been a big adjustment is an understatement.
As a general rule, I don’t believe in “balance.” It seems impossible to throw everything up in the air and keep everything exactly where it should be without anything ever moving. I tend to see life as a giant pie…yum…pie, chocolate pie, pumpkin pie, Lizzie Custer’s apple pie with ice cream…ack! Focus! Back to my ‘life pie’!
Due to all of the recent adjustments, my husband and I have found our pies being consumed with work (both of us learning new jobs) and parenting. There’s probably been a small slice of the pie that could be considered housekeeping, but let’s be honest, the size of that slice would be less than a sliver.
We have basically let these two important parts of our lives (parenting and work) take over the part of our pie that should include relationships with friends, ourselves, and each other. Don’t think I forgot about God – he’s the crust that holds everything together! He’s always there guiding me in my realignment and giving me a nudge when things aren’t quite right.
This has happened to us before. In fact, I really think it’s just the ebb and flow of life, especially our life. We move frequently and with those moves comes about a year of really adjusting and settling in (and then, before we know it, we’re doing it all over again!).
So, this week, since my husband’s been TDY for two weeks, I got to thinking. Why are we both so unhappy and irritable? And then it hit me like a pie in the face.
We need to distribute our pie a little more evenly. Immediately. AS SOON AS POSSIBLE!!
I’m not saying every part of our life needs to have an equal slice, but giving work half the pie and parenting half the pie certainly is not working out. Our kids are grouchy, we’re grouchy, and our poor dog has so much energy she’s eaten about half the girls’ crayons…and I’m tired of picking up rainbow poop.
So, being the planner I am, I created a Pie Redistribution Plan of Action. My husband and I need to get out of this house – together – without kids! I need a sitter to relieve us of our parental duties twice a month so I can make the size of our “Couples Slice” a little bigger. I texted our sitter and booked her through January. Good news, she can even come one time next week – woohoo!!
I’ve also made a list of fun date ideas we can do together. I’m not sitting in a movie theater not talking to my husband. I want to get out and do something fun!
I have some plans for the other slices of my pie. I may even invest in myself more often! My exercise and eating habits have gone down the drain (refer to my love of pie mentioned above). I am antsy and need to get back in the swing of things, which includes more frequent exercise and better eating habits.
Don’t get me wrong, we love our children and our jobs, but we can’t let them take over. If you’re out there and your pie is out of whack…reclaim it. You made it and you have the power to change it. Now call your sitter and get some ice cream for your pie!